Pillar of Wellness: Emotional

Emotions are the most pressing force in your life. We are all driven by daily emotions. Emotional expressions are universal and cross-cultural. People with healthy emotional wellness feel confident, in control of their feelings and behaviours, and can handle life challenges. Working through life challenges can build resilience as we learn that setbacks can be overcome.


Our emotions

Emotions describe physiological states and are generated subconsciously. Usually, they are autonomous bodily responses to certain external or internal events. Emotions communicate to others. It is in the vulnerable space of emotional communications that we connect through empathy. 

By contrast, feelings are subjective experiences of emotions and are driven by conscious thoughts and reflections.


There is no doubt that your emotions dictate your actions, intentions, and thoughts. But, act on your emotions too quickly, and you risk making decisions you may regret. Emotions are catchy and can influence your wellbeing. Your emotions can be read by tonality of speech, the body language you unconsciously  use, and your facial expressions are more impactful than the words we use. 

Managing your emotions takes practice and may  need the assistance of a psychotherapist – CBT  or Life coach to help you  succeed. Manage your thought process and you will be able to  manage your emotions. You do not have to accept, act on, or label every thought that comes into your brain. Take control of your brain and rewire the emotional aspects of how you behave.  Not all behaviour is acceptable in the workplace or in a social environment.

“Each of us is unique and incomparable—you are just yourself; nobody has ever been like you and nobody will ever be like you and you need not be like anybody else, either.” ― Osho

Experiencing Stress and Anxiety

S – Stop take a moment, slow down

T – Take a breath, take a few deep breaths through your nose and mouth

O – Orientate yourself. What are you concentrating on? What is it exactly that you are reacting to? What are the changes in my body at this moment?

P – Pull back and place the events into perspective. Think about the bigger picture, think of another way you can interpret the situation. What would you say to someone about how to conduct themselves?

P – Practice the techniques and tools from CBT. Catch the thoughts, Check them for validity, Change them into positive perspectives.

Growing our EQ – Emotional Quotient

Imagine a seesaw where on the left side we have IQ – Intelligence Quotient and on the right side we have our Personality. Not much use as a seesaw unless we have a fulcrum to pivot on. This is where our EQ fits into the picture.


Emotional Quotient


Intelligence Quotient


Growing our EQ – It is the ability to:

Deal successfully with other people

  • Manage self
  • Motivate others
  • Understand one’s own feelings 
  • Respond Appropriately
  • Uses emotions to facilitate thinking

Growing our EQ – Managing Yourself


For empathy to work, a person must first be able to recognize, classify, and understand their own feelings. Empathy is sharing in the feelings of others, whether joy or sadness is an admirable trait.


It is important to remember that your emotions are not the ‘enemy’. They contain valuable information that if used properly, can help you make sound decisions. Being able to use techniques which allow you to continue working productively even when strong emotions, such as extreme anxiety or panic, are present.


Being able to understand the destructive impact that the emotion may have on yourself, your reputation, and others, and taking steps to successfully reduce this impact. Part of managing oneself is the ability to be stable.

Self Confidence

This is a basic belief that we can do what is needed to produce the desired outcome. There are times when things do not work out as you plan, but you need be able to admit that and then use your flexibility to get things back on track.

 “Experience is not what happens to you –it’s how you interpret what happens to you.” -Aldous Huxley

Growing our EQ – Managing Your Team

Developing Others

Your team members are unique more than just employees or a job title. They have diverse skills, talents, and knowledge that could be beneficial to your overall goals.

Holding People Accountable

It means taking ownership of their life, work, behaviour, well-being, and health – the successes and the failures. Remove ambiguity and wiggle room, communicate concisely get feedback

Team Leadership

When you do establish rules, make sure that they connect to your values. When these supports both your business and your team members beliefs, they will be more inclined to jump to support and back these rule

Results Orientation

Keep the focus on the tasks and activities that are related to achieving the results. Define all the related tasks and activities in terms of the results to be achieved.


Encourage your team to be open minded and explore possibilities. Allow your team to  think for themselves and reward them for doing so.

Problem Solving

Your ability to understand how emotions in decision- making operate and how you remain calm. Your ability to solve a problem and not let it affect you and the people around you will bring calm and creative thinking into play.

Growing our EQ – Managing Collaboratively

Influencing Others

To persuade or inspire them to put forth their best efforts toward the clear objective you have defined. Influence competence draws on empathy, without understanding the other person’s perspective and sensing their feelings, influencing them becomes more difficult.

Fostering Teamwork

Recognize that team collaboration requires effective team interactions based on trust grown from relationship-based behaviour. Appeal to their values, your belief in the team, holding them to high expectations for growth and achievement.

The greatest ability in business is to get along with others and influence their actions. -John Hancock


  • See the bigger picture. Everything in your life serves a higher purpose. Amid an upsetting event, trust there is an ultimate purpose.
  • Try not to react immediately. Take deep breaths for few minutes, feel your muscles relax and your heart rate slow down and remind yourself that this will pass.
  • Replace your thoughts. Negative emotions equal recurring negative thoughts. When you are confronted with an emotion that is upsetting, force the negativity out of your mind and think happy thoughts.
  • Find a healthy outlet. Do not bottle up your emotions. Write them down in a journal or talk to someone you trust about the incident.
  • Do activities that involve each of your senses: smell, taste, touch, sight, and sound. 
  • Listen to music, eat your favourite food, light your favourite candle, play with your pet, and watch your favourite movie or the sunset.

Emotional Wellness Pillar Check-Up

EQ where do you stand?

  • How empathetic am I?
  • Do I recognize and manage my own feelings?
  • How do I respond to other peoples’ emotions and feelings?
  • How do I  manage my  emotions in stressful or high anxiety situations?
  • How do I calm myself down?
  • How do I exercise and manage my self-control at home, work, social?
  • What is my level of flexibility to adapt to  situations that  change?
Self Confidence
  • How confident am I in my work, social and home life?
  • What am I  doing to  grow my self-confidence?
Developing others
  • In what way am I managing negative attitudes and feelings in my work environment?
  • How self-aware am I?
  • Am I observant of other people’s emotions and feelings?
Problem Solving
  • How do I manage my emotions during decision making?
  • How objective am I?
  • Am I managing my personal Bias?

Get In Touch

If you are experiencing Anxiety , Stress or depression talk to  someone and get help: